“The only journey is the journey within.” — Rainer Maria Rilke
Jim Rohn said, “the greatest gift you can give somebody is your own personal development.” The person I am today is not the person I was five years ago, a year ago, a month ago, or last week. Each day I make a conscious effort to change. Change for the better that is. With each human interaction I analyze how I respond and if I was not satisfied with the way I reacted then I figure out how will I handle this situation in the future. The future doesn’t always mean years from now it can mean hours or even minutes from the last encounter.
When I started my blog, I wanted to share with my readers my struggles and the changes I go through each week that make and shape me every day. My ups and downs and the things I no longer allow to interfere with my self-development in hopes to inspire others to life their life fully devoted to improving themselves. If we improve ourselves everything arounds us start to change. When I started focusing on areas, I needed to improve I realized I had a lot of areas to improve in. I’m not striving to be perfect by any means because we are not perfect, and we can’t be perfect that’s why it important to understand when people let us down, we should easily forgive them as we would also like to be forgiven. I know its not hard to forgive but if you read my past post on forgiveness you will understand that forgiveness its not for them its for us.
Part of self-development is releasing the things that causes us pain and then becoming someone who we aspire to be. You can’t develop yourself by holding on to dead weight. Dead weight is regrets, unforgiveness, the past, etcetera. In order to improve in all areas of your life we must start each day fresh, don’t worry about what you didn’t do yesterday focus on what you will do differently so that you won’t regret yesterday, the past.
Reading books and taking in information has helped me improve in my life. I read articles about parenting, marriage, human interaction, self-improving, and the list goes on. I read and listen to a variety of information to improve all areas of my life. When I think I am struggle as a parent, which isn’t an easy job I must say, I read and listen to stuff. I know I won’t be a perfect parent but when I read parenting articles or listen to audibles or watch videos sometimes different parenting styles can help me when I feel like I exhausted all my ideas.
As my children grow and develop, they change and learning about each stage in their life helps me be able to parent them. I want to make it clear there is no perfect way to raise children, everyone must do what works for them. Its trial and error. You try things to see if they work and if they don’t then you move on.
When I read books about marriage and relationships it helps supplement my relationship with my husband. I enjoy constantly improving my life so that I can be a better human being. I want to always be operating at my optimum self and that requires me to constantly work on myself. Developing yourself is deciding to never stop learning. When people come to me for advice though I might be helping them I also helping myself in the process. I listen to them and figure out what will I do in the situation and then I respond, and I take that advice and store it in my brain just incase I might need it later.
As a child I was self-expressive, I spoke my mind and didn’t care who was hurt. Now as an adult I learned the proper way to express myself in a way to help and not hurt the person I am giving advice to. Learning to control my anger is also one of the areas I worked on in my life. When I would have conflict with someone it often would end ugly now, I know everything doesn’t require a reaction and I know how to express myself in a professional way so that it doesn’t turn into a heated argument. I know that I had a lot of issues to work on in my life and I was honest with myself when I said I needed to improve. You must be willing to look at your life and figure out what you must do so that you can be satisfied with yourself. When we are not operating at potential, we will be displeased with ourselves. We can act like it doesn’t bother us, but it does. We need to be developing ourselves every day. Its important to our well-being.
Self- Development isn’t something that happens overnight, it’s a constant effort to change for the better every day. This is something we do for the rest of our life. If you want to have healthy relationship that includes, parent child, friends, spouse, colleagues, and regular human interaction, this starts with improving yourself. Don’t focus on how everyone else reacts to you, if they react negative, protect yourself by choosing to react in a way that will be pleasing to your soul.
Our self-development isn’t going to change the way people around us think and act. Our self-development is helpful and the way we react to the way people think and act. We will no longer be moved by the things people do because we will detach ourselves from them. You develop an understanding for human beings, and you will sympathize knowing that they still have room to grow. Their actions will not always be pleasing to us, but they are in control of their life we are in control of how we react to the way they choose to live their life. When you realize that they have their own life to live then you will understand that not everything requires a reaction.
As parents or even individuals we get so upset with the way people chooses to live their lives, but you must be willing to look at it from a different perspective. Imagine if someone had a problem with how you choose to life your life, your actions, the person you choose to date, etcetera, etcetera. Wouldn’t you be upset about how they were concern with your choice of living? I would be. It’s my life, if I choose to mess it up, let me. If I ask you for advice it still okay if I choose not to take it. That’s why self-development is important.
When you focus on yourself fully you won’t have time to worry about how everyone else is choosing to live their life. Also, at the end of the day we ultimately must live our own lives. I can’t live my children lives, my family, my husband, or even my friend’s life. They are responsible for their own choices and those come with good or bad consequences also known as lessons. I know that though I am instilling valuable advice in my children lives, I know that they might not take all of it. I understand this and I know that it is fine, I will love them either way they choose to live their life because it’s their life, not mine.
So, as you go about today don’t focus on how everyone else chooses to live their life, start focusing on your own life. Self-Development is key and in order for you to grow you must be willing to make changes in your life.
“We must become the change we want to see.” — Mahatma Gandhi